Building a Loving Family

Everyone desires to have family relationships that are loving and functional. For this you need to learn and apply the qualities loving families share. Here are five signs:
1. An attitude of service. Slavery is at the heart of dysfunctional families. When people serve others because they are forced to do so, freedom to truly serve is lost. In Islam there is a greater emphasis on fulfilling other people’s rights and helping them than on demanding one’s own rights. For children, developing an attitude of service is a process. In the early stages, acts of service must be required. But the goal is that the child will find personal satisfaction in serving others.
2. Intimacy between husband and wife. Building intimacy is a process. It involves self-revelation, in which one tells the other something of his or her thoughts, feelings and experiences. The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam once told his wife Aeysha radhiallahu anha: "I know whether you are angry or pleased." She asked, "How do you know that, Allah's Apostle?" He said, "When you are pleased, you say, ‘Yes, by the Lord of Muhammad,' but when you are angry, you say, 'No, by the Lord of Abraham!' She replied, ‘Yes, I do not leave, except your name." His love was still in her heart.
3. Parents who teach and train. Parents will be actively involved in giving guidance to their children by teaching and training and not just focusing on one and neglecting the other.
4. Children who obey and honor parents. Obedient behavior brings positive consequences; disobedient behavior brings negative consequences. In a loving family, parents will focus on these: loving the child, and making sure the child experiences the consequences of his or her behavior. This involves setting rules, setting consequences (good as well as bad), and administering discipline.
5. Husbands who are loving leaders. The Hadith mentions that the best person is one who is best to his family. `

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