One of the tasks parents face is introducing the child to the peer group (friends). They want their child to enjoy the company of other children and resist the influence of aggressive friends. How can they do this?
It depends on the parenting style. There are 3:
n Authoritarian parents are low in nurturance, high in parental control. They set absolute standards of behavior that are not to be questioned.
n Permissive parents are high in nurturance, but low in parental control. Although their children are friendly, they lack knowledge of appropriate behavior for social situations and take little responsibility.
n Authoritative parents are high in nurturance, moderate in parental control. This is best in making a child sociable and is proven from Hadith.
¢ Good nurturing habits include: 1) Affection: The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) once crawled on his hands and knees while Hasan and Husayn rode on his back. 2) Consideration for child's feelings: A Hadith says: ‘Treat your children equally’. 3) Interest in child's activities; 4) Respect for child's view; 5) Expressing pride in child's accomplishments: Umar radhiallahu anhu told his son to answer in the presence of elder Sahaaba when the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam asked a question as he would feel happy; 6) Support in times of stress. E.g. Islam emphasises sympathy with bereaved in the case of a death. High levels of nurturance virtually assure positive interaction in daily family life. This, in turn, makes the child return love to the parent, increasing parental influence throughout childhood. These children resist peer values different from family values.
7) Moderate control: Nurturing parents maintain moderate control over their child and do not give up the right to set behavioral standards. 8) Avoid harsh physical punishment: A Hadith says: The best of you will never use force to deal with their families.
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