The Old Woman

AN OLD woman came to the Holy Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) and asked him to pray that she enter Paradise.

"Old women," said he, "cannot enter Paradise." The old lady turned away weeping.
The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) then said, "Tell her that she will not enter Paradise in her aged condition." Allah Ta’ala will make all the women of Paradise young virgins.

Indulging in humour is permissible provided it does not lead to hard-heartedness, nor is someone hurt.

The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) was asked regarding the fact that he also cracked jokes. He replied, "Yes, but I do not speak lies."

According to Muhaddith Sufyaan bin Uyaina joking is sunnah if done correctly .

An Unusual Feast

A poor man passed a restaurant. He caught the smell of food and sniffed. The owner came out. "You smelt my food and you have to pay!" he bellowed. "I have no money!" said the poor man. "You're coming with me to the judge!" shouted the owner. The poor man spotted Mullah Nasrudin, who came and spoke for him. The judge ordered the poor man to pay. Nasrudin stepped forward. "Let me pay." he said. He shook a bag of coins next to the rich man's ear. The coins jingled. "Can you hear that?" asked Nasrudin."Of course," the man replied. "That is your payment," said Nasrudin. "My brother smelt your food and you heard his money. The debt is paid."In the face of such argument the poor man went free.

Ibn Rawahah radhiallahu anhu

Ikramah reports that Abdullah Ibn Rawahah (radhiallahu anhu) was lying with his wife. He got up, went to his slave girl and became engaged with her. His wife awoke and, not finding him, became worried. When she saw him with his slave girl, she went to her room and came out with a knife. Meanwhile, Ibn Rawahah had moved away.
He met his wife, knife in hand and asked what the matter was. She replied, "You’re asking what the matter is! If I had found you where I had seen you, I would have plunged the knife between your shoulders." Ibn Rawahah asked where she had seen him. She replied with the slave girl.
Ibn Rawahah said, "The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) has forbidden recitation of Qur’aan in a state of pollution (requiring a bath)." Hearing this, his wife said, "Recite the Qur’aan!" Ibn Rawahah recited some couplets of poetry in praise of the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam).
On hearing this, his wife said, "I believe in Allah and disbelieve my eyes." Ibn Rawahah went early to the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) and related the incident. The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) laughed so much that his molars became visible.

[Hayatus Sahabah, v3, pg10/1]

Here we read of the tremendous love that a wife had for her husband that drove her to secure his love, of her unquestioning belief in the truth of Allah and His Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam), of the husband’s understanding that did not lead him to become abusive, and of a lesson in using wisdom to diffuse potentially acrimonious situations. May Allah Ta’ala Bless the Sahaabah.

More Tales of the Funny Mullah

TIT FOR TAT
Mullah Nasruddin went into a shop to buy a pair of trousers. He changed his mind and chose a cloak instead at the same price. Picking up the cloak he left the shop. "You haven’t paid!" shouted the merchant. "I left you the trousers, which were the same value as the cloak." "But you did not pay for the trousers either. Of course not, said mullah; why should I pay for something that I didn’t want to buy?"

LOST RING
One day Mullah Nasruddin lost his ring in the basement of his house, where it was dark. There being no chance of finding it in that darkness, he started looking for it on the street. A passer-by asked: "What are you looking for Nasruddin?" "I've lost my ring in the basement." "But Nasruddin, why don't you look for it in the basement where you lost it?" asked the man in surprise. "Don't be silly! How do you expect me to find anything in that darkness!" said Nasruddin.

A MAN OF HIS WORD
A friend asked the Mulla, "How old are you?" "40," replied the mullah. The friend said, "But you said the same thing two years ago!" "Yes," replied the mullah, "I always stands by what I have said."

MIND READER
Once someone came to Mullah Nasruddin, a man famed for his wit and wisdom. The man said, "Holy man, show me the way to town." "How do you know I’m a holy man?" asked Nasruddin. "Because I’m a mind reader," came the reply. "Well," answered the Mullah, "Then you should be able to read the way to town because it’s in my mind!"

The Mullah’s Donkey

A neighbor who Mullah Nasruddin didn't like came over to his yard one day. The neighbor asked if he could borrow his donkey. Nasruddin, not wanting to lend it, said, "I’d love to loan you my donkey but my brother took it to carry his wheat to the mill. It isn’t here." The neighbor thanked Nasruddin and walked away.
As he took a few steps, Nasruddin's donkey, which was in the back all the time, let out a bray. The neighbor turned to Nasruddin and said, "Mullah Sahib, I thought you said your donkey wasn’t here." Nasruddin said, "My friend, who are you going to believe? Me or the donkey?

Mullah Nasruddeen

More tales of the wise and funny Mullah

Nasruddin opened a booth with a sign above it:
Two Questions On Any Subject Answered For Only 100 Silver Coins.
A man who had two very urgent questions handed over his money, saying: A hundred silver coins is rather expensive for two questions, isn't it? Yes, said Nasruddin, next question, please?

One day Nasruddin went to a banquet. As he was dressed rather shabbily, no one let him in. So he ran home, put on his best robe and fur coat and returned. Immediately, the host came over, greeted him and ushered him to the head of an elaborate banquet table.
When the food was served, Nasruddin took some soup with a spoon and pushed it to the his fur coat and said, Eat my fur coat, eat! It's obvious that you're the real guest of honor today, not me!

Mullah Nasruddeen: Humour

HAIR ON THE PALMS
Once, the King asked Mullah Nasruddeen: "Why is there no hair growing on the palms of my hands?"
Mullah: Because of giving charity constantly, the hair has faded.
King: Then why is there no hair on the palms of others?
Mullah: Because of receiving charity constantly from the king, the hair has faded.
King: Then why is there no hair on then palms of those who neither give nor take?
Mullah: Because they rub their hands constantly out of regret, saying: Alas! We are neither givers nor takers!

MILK FROM THE DAIRY
One day, giving an empty bucket to his son, Mullah said: "Son, go fetch some milk from the dairy."
Son: But Father, what about the money to buy it?
Mullah: With money, anyone can buy milk. If you can bring me milk without money, you will truly be my son! I will be proud of you.
The son takes the bowl. Goes to the market, and returns after a few minutes.
Son: Here Father, drink the milk!
Mullah was taken aback. How could his son get milk with no money? He took the bucket and saw it was empty.
Mullah: But there is no milk!
Son: Pa, if there is milk, anyone can drink it. But if you can drink it as is, you are truly my father and I will be proud of you.
Tit for tat! What could the Father do?

The Smuggler: Humour

Mullah Nasruddeen used to come to the border of the country every week for many years, with a donkey laden with straw.
The border guards suspected that he was smuggling something but, try as they may, they could not find out what. They searched the straw thoroughly but nothing came to light. This carried on for many years.
The Mullah eventually retired. One day he met a border guard who said, "Look Mullah. We know you were smuggling something all these years. Now you can tell me what it was as we cannot do you anything."
Mullah Nasruddeen replied, "I was smuggling, it’s true. But what I was smuggling was DONKEYS!"
Many a times we judge others according to our set prejudices. This makes us blind to their true worth. Let us look at everyone as a potential medium of learning something new, something beneficial, rather than condemning a person because he does not think or act like us.

Humour

The Muslim has a sense of humour and jokes when appropriate, without extremes or saying anything hurtful. When serious, he does not go to extremes.

JOKING
A man came to the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) asking for a riding animal. The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) jokingly told him that he’d give him the offspring of a camel. The man, thinking of a baby animal, asked what he would do with it as he could not ride it. He was told that all riding-camels are offspring of camels (and were once young). [Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi]
LIGHT-HEARTED MOMENTS
Zahir was a man from the desert. He used to bring gifts from the desert to the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) who loved him. One day the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) came to him while he was selling goods and caught him from behind. Zahir couldn’t see, so he said, ‘Let me go! Who’s this?’ Imagine such light-heartedness from the noble Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam)!

FUN
One Hadith that reflects the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam)’s sense of humour and enjoyment of fun is reported by Aisha (radhiallahu anha), his wife. who went with him on a journey. At that time she was young and slender. The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) told the people to go ahead so they did, then he said to her, 'Come, let us race.' They raced and she won. Later, when she gained weight, she went on another journey. He told the people to go ahead and they did. They raced and he won. He began to laugh, and said, 'This (win) is for that (first loss).'

DELIGHTFUL REPORTS
Sahaaba used to throw melon-rinds at one another, but when matters were serious, they were the only true men. (al-Adab al-Mufrad) This is moderate, Islamically acceptable humour which refreshes hearts and minds and is within the confines of Islam. There are many reports about jokes exchanged between the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) and the Sahabah. He is reported to have laughed at the Sahaaba’s humorous actions.

Sahaaba saw nothing wrong with having fun, as they saw the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) occasionally doing so. The many delightful stories about their sense of humour reflect the easy-going nature of the first Islamic society, and how far removed it was from narrow-mindedness and gloom.

(www.radioislam.co.za)